{"product_id":"ceramic-coaster-calm-your-tits","title":"Ceramic Coaster - Calm Your Tits","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eGold accents. Zero chill. Introducing the ultimate piece of home décor advice you didn’t know you needed: the “Calm Your Tits” ceramic coaster. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhether your wine glass is sweating or your friend is, this shiny little square is here to soak up the drama and the condensation. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eCrafted from durable ceramic and finished with a hint of metallic gold sass, it’s perfect for your coffee table, desk, or passive-aggressively placed under your mother-in-law’s tea. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e✅ Protects surfaces \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e✅ Delivers attitude \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e✅ Doesn’t actually calm tits (we checked) \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eGive your beverages a place to rest—and your guests a gentle nudge to simmer the hell down. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePremium drink coaster details:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e4.25 X 4.25 inches \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eCeramic Coaster \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePremium raised gold finish.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Disrupted Industries","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":43113679257683,"sku":"30433","price":12.0,"currency_code":"AUD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0740\/6349\/files\/93cca100afb0f60d8f9fba7396251f7212c110bd74551825a610d2cb95a8f779.jpg?v=1760330262","url":"https:\/\/www.eggplantandpoppy.com.au\/products\/ceramic-coaster-calm-your-tits","provider":"Eggplant \u0026 Poppy ~ Unique + Quirky Gifts","version":"1.0","type":"link"}